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Joke of the Day
"What is the most sensitive part on mans body while he is masturbating. His ears."
Next Joke
"What do you call a castrated German? A Munich"
"AMA I left the Church of Scientology two weeks ago [Deleted]"
"When you have ""very happily married"" in your bio, we read that as ""DM me about my other secret account 'cause my spouse watches this one."""
"Grabs intercom: ANYONE WHO WOULD LIKE TO JOIN MY MILITIA, STAY HERE! WE ARE GOING TO OCCUPY THIS OLIVE GARDEN UNTIL I GET MORE BREADSTICKS"
"*repeatedly tries to explain Sisyphus to classmates who have apparently never heard of him* I wish you guys could get how ironic this is."
"[baby wakes up in the middle night] ""Go back to sleep, hun. I'll sort it out."" [puts baby on eBay]"
"What did Kurtis Blow tell his son when teaching him how to drive? THESE are the brakes!"
"What do you call an old John Cena? John Cenile"
"My friend asked me if I wanted to watch Dr. Strange. I declined because I have Stranger Things to watch."