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Joke of the Day

"[Job interview] -Are you going to just keep spinning around in that chair? Sorry. I didn't think we started yet."

"That moment when you check the price tag and sadly walk away."

"""Hola, Senor, do you want me to shift into second gear?"" Manuel transmission"

"I was watching FOX Sports, but decided to switch to the History Channel... You still get to see the US destroy Japan, but there are fewer commercials! Edit: grammar"

"Why did Adolf Hitler commit suicide? Artificial Intelligence."

"So carrying a ""wet floor"" sign and putting it down immediately after using your best pickup line on a woman is frowned upon Dating is hard."

"Q: Why can't Ray Charles see his friends? A: Because he's married."

"Old enough to know better, but still too drunk to care."

"If Hillary Clinton and Donald Trump are in a boat and it capsizes. Who survives? America."

"How many Broncos does it take to change a tire? One. Unless it's a blowout then the whole team shows up."