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Joke of the Day

"Helen Keller I pushed Helen Keller into a ditch in the middle of the woods, she screamed and screamed until her hands hurt."

"What is the difference between a horse and a cabbage? I have never been hungry enough that I could eat a cabbage."

"I just lost my virginity!!!! April fools *sob*"

"My dream girl is basically a pizza in a mini skirt."

"It sounds like the dog's nails need trimming. Either that or she's off in the distance, typing, ""It was a dark and stormy night."""

"Breaking News: United States is now the largest producer of salt. So Salty..."

"Bob: Did you hear about the camper who was killed by a garter snake? Betty: That's impossible. A garter snake is not poisonous. Bob: It doesn't have to be if it can make you jump off a cliff!"

"I hope my childhood BFF forgot that silly pact we made at five to kill each other if we hadn't become ponies by 2015. She was really dark."

"90% of the economy is just women giving each other useless gifts."

"Why do Redditors get excited when a tornado rips down miles of fences? Because there is a lot of reposting to do."