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Joke of the Day

"Hi kids I'm Keanu Reeves here to tell you that speed is never cool unless you're a professional SWAT member on a bus that's about to blow up"

"When I ask someone what their name is, why do I never actually listen to their answer?"

"There was supposed to be a BLM march today with up to a million people Although it's strange that I only count 600,000."

"How do you tell the sex of an ant? If it floats, it's a boy-ant."

"What do you get when you finger a gypsy on her period? Your palm red for free"

"Hillary's So Crooked.... Hillary's So Crooked She Needs A Kaine!"

"How are butter and a prostitute similar? They both spread for bread"

"What do you call a train when it's eating? A Chew-Chew Train! Side note, I have cheesy jokes for days."

"How many votes does it take to change a light bulb? Votes don't change shit."

"How can you tell if someone is from New York? They always talk about how they're from New York."