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Joke of the Day

"If you're suicidal and experience time backwards, then you're in luck! The only way you can commit suicide is by getting in some pussy."

"Two cows walk in to a bar... Then one of the cows says: ""*Mooooo*"", then the other replies, ""*Fuck, I was supposed to say that*"""

"Why do black people only have nightmares? Because the first one that had a dream got shot."

"The programmer to his son: ""Here I brought you a new basketball."" ""Thank you daddy but where is the user's guide?"""

"Pretty sure the neighbors are impressed with the banging and screaming they heard. Little do they know it was just me chasing a spider."

"awesome jokes guys keep em coming As a single father, I love browsing this subreddit so when I see my wifes kids once a month I have a lot of epic jokes to tell them. Keep em coming!"

"One farmer says to another farmer... ""You can get more sales out of your crops by canning."" The second farmer looks and says, ""I know, I can. I can."""

"Last rites? Over my dead body..."

"Marrying a divorced man is ecologically responsible. In a world where there are more women than men, it pays to recycle."

"I got into an argument with my friend and he said, ""Yeah, well my dad can beat up your dad!"" I'm sick of these dad hominem attacks."