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Joke of the Day

"Did you blow bubbles when you were a kid? Of course you did. I saw him the other day at the mall making balloon animals. He says hi."

"Knock Knock Who's there ! Buckle ! Buckle who ? Buckle get you a drink but not much else !"

"I'm not saying four kids is too many, I'm just saying it would be kind of cool if I could melt them all down to form one kid, that's all."

"Why don't lobsters share? Because they're shellfish..."

"If your surname is Rice and you don't name your kid, Fried then I can never be friends with you."

"What do you call a fallen tree in a forest? Natural log. Sorry about the math joke."

"The man who invented Velcro has died. RIP"

"When I was a kid there were reports of alligators in the sewers that would come up through toilets. It turned out to be a croc of shit."

"Me: What's with the look? Hub: How would you like a full-service massage? Me: I would, but will you and the kids be okay while I'm gone?"

"I'm teaching my boys to leave the toilet seat up so there's no pee on it when I put it down. Everything is a lie and life is a bad dream."