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Joke of the Day

"I'm sorry sir, your wife didn't make it. Was it *sniff* the lack of prayers on Facebook? Yes sir, I'm afraid it was."

"Karma has no menu. You get served what you deserve."

"What do you call it when an immigrant and a pedophile get into a fight? Alien Vs. Predator"

"RIDDLER: how'd you find my hideout? BATMAN: a little birdie told me *winks* SMALL BIRD MAN: *lands on his shoulder* please use my full name"

"I like my women like I like my Chinese chemical storage facilities Ready to blow at any minute"

"Remember where to put your commas kids... There's a big difference between helping your old uncle Jack, off his horse..."

"They call it ""PMS"" because... Mad Cow Disease was already taken."

"Santa: its snowing Christmas is canceled Put everything in the garbage Elves: no! Rudolph: what if I told you I had a very small red light"

"Republicans & Democrats are like divorced parents who care more about getting the kids to hate the other one than they are their well-being."

"A pirate with two peg legs walks into a bar... The bartender looks up from his newspaper and says ""you're cut off."""