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Joke of the Day

"I lost my mood ring earlier today... I'm not sure how I feel about that."

"What is a 6.9 ? A good thing ruined by a period."

"Why are under-endowed men likely to get lucky with homeopathic physicians? Because they like their dicks vanishingly small ..."

"Someone was taken down to the police station after they were caught drinking vodka from a coffee cup while driving. They took a mug shot."

"Takes a very specific type of confidence to drop off your hoodie at coat check."

"Due to a mix up my cat ended up in a beauty contest and not at the vet. To my surprise she apparently won some gimmick trophy for fluffiest butt. It was a real *catastrophe.*"

"Why hasn't the Rastafarian gone to see the barber? He's dreading it."

"""the names bond, james bond"" [5 min later] STARBUCKS BARISTA: i gota frappe for borbjorbple"

"A joke walks into a bar... Bartender says woah! I've never *meta* joke before"

"Tripler's Dating Tips 20/50: hide a tape recorder in your pocket with a laugh track on it and press play after every single thing you say"