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Joke of the Day

"Confucius Say . . . Man who run in front of car get tired. Man who run behind car get exhausted. Stabbing a man with a spoon is pointless."

"What do you call a rapper who likes honey for breakfast? Sugar Puff Daddy"

"Sorry I asked for a rim job... ... it was only tongue in cheek."

"Surprised ""too much"" still isn't a serving size."

"My girlfriend said she doesn't mind what car she gets, as long as it gets her from A to B. Which I fully support. Her boobs are far too small."

"My girlfriend said she wants me to make her feel like shes the only girl in the world. So i'm gonna drop her off in the desert and leave"

"God took a paternity test He found out he was the father, the son and the holy spirit."

"How many Freudians does it take to screw their mothers? Not mothers, lightbulbs. Shit."

"The guy who invented throat lozenges died last week. There was no coffin at the funeral"

"Why do the undead read cringe stories? Because they're already... DEAD INSIDE."