91554

Joke of the Day

"Every woman wants to be swept off her feet. It's when you put her in the trunk of your car that she starts to panic."

"Knock knock... **Knock Knock** Who's there? **Interrupting Cow.** Interrupting Cow who? **Moo...... FUCK!**"

"A joke for Europe A Greek, an Italian, and a Spaniard go into a bar and have an awesome time, ordering drinks till dawn. So who pays the tab? A German."

"My girl caught me blowing my dick with the air dryer, and asked what I was doing? Apparently ""heating your dinner"" wasn't a good answer."

"What do you call a three humped camel? Pregnant. (Credit goes to the trailer of Zootopia)"

"What do you call a drunk dinosaur? A stagger-saurus."

"What did the choir teacher say to the student who asked to use the bathroom? Of chorus."

"A double amputee was brought in for questioning after a shooting at a local convenience store. Police released the man soon after they discovered he was unarmed."

"I'm Winston Wolf, I fix problems. So I hear you're having a bad hair day."

"Me: What are your plans for tonight? 13: Think I'll hang out with you and mom. Me: Goddammit...uh I mean that's great."