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Joke of the Day

"How does a train eat? It goes chew chew!"

"Why do women have smaller feet than men? It's one of those ""evolutionary things"" that allows them to stand closer to the kitchen sink."

"Boxing is dead as... Mayweather's wife if she talks back again."

"I was inept with girls in high school. Once I tried to unhook a bra strap and accidentally made a macrame plant hanger."

"Certain religions condemn eating pig meat. They're against the idea of cannibalism."

"Waiter Waiter there's a fly in my ice-cream ! Gee I did not know that they had started winter sports so early in the year !"

"For a second I thought this cookie had raisins in it, but luckily they're just spider egg sacs."

"What's the difference between light and hard? I can go to sleep with a light on."

"When a raccoon stands up and cracks his knuckles, stop shaving him immediately."

"TRUTHFUL TUESDAY: When my son was 7 he pissed me off so badly I pressed all the elevator buttons knowing every new rider would blame him."