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Joke of the Day

"How many tickles does it take to tickle an octopus? Tentacles!"

"What's a redneck's favorite kind of bread? Inbred."

"What's the difference between peanut butter and jam? I don't jam after drinking a gallon of nut butter."

"What is the difference between a trampoline and a baby? A trampoline doesn't look adorable in a sailor outfit"

"I really want to buy one of those grocery checkout dividers. But the lady behind the counter keeps putting it back."

"The name's Bond. Ionic Bond. Taken, not shared."

"Summer and winter had been growing apart as friends... when summer called up winter she ask him why he was so cold."

"What's the hardest part about being a Vegan who does Crossfit and owns a Rescue dog? Deciding which to tell people first."

"Did you hear about the psychic midget that escaped from jail? Headline read: Small Medium at Large"

"Pavlov is sitting at a bar... ...when another patron walks in and a bell on the door rings. Pavlov stands up, says, ""I forgot to feed the dogs,"" and leaves."