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Joke of the Day

"DR DOG: The test results came back. PATIENT: Oh God DR DOG: The tumor is-- *sees a squirrel out the window and takes off*"

"Why does Voldemort always sit in the nosebleed section at events? So he'll finally have the chance to get a bloody nose."

"Cold War Hungarian Joke Communism is the noble struggle by the proletariat to overcome problems that only exist under Communism."

"""Get me another beer, boy"" ""Dad I'm an adult. My name's Bobby"" ""It's time you knew the truth boy. The 2nd & 3rd B's in your name are silent"""

"My ex was an absolute treasure and by treasure I mean you'll need a shovel and map to find him."

"What does Bruce Lee like to eat before a fight to the death? QUINOOOOAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!"

"I want the Cowboys to come to my funeral so they can let me down one last time!! (Shots fired)"

"Extra car key Extra house key Extra storage unit key Key to an extra apartment with a liquor cabinet - Keys to a successful relationship"

"I just put a cat & a mouse in a cage and I must say, this is nothing like Tom & Jerry."

"What does a gay horse eat? Dick."