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Joke of the Day

"My friend, upon hearing that Chris Pratt will be in the new Jurassic World film... Are you looking forward to Jurassic Parks and Recreation?"

"What did the horse say to whinnie the pooh while watching his t.v. show? I wish I could hear you whinnie."

"Why do asians got to the hospital after voting? Everyone knows that you should see a doctor for an erection that last longer than 4 hours."

"An ion walked up to Lost and Found and reported that he had lost an electron. The clerk asked:are you sure? The ion replied :Yes, I am positive.VCN"

"Fucking terrorists. I guess I can't google ""nice truck"" anymore to find out about the latest pickups on the market...."

"Little kid making faces at you from his bus window? Follow him home and make faces through his window at night."

"I had a really big shit the other day. It was a real pain in the ass."

"What is a seal's favorite drink? Club soda"

"What do you give a canine seeking meaningless validation on the internet? Pupvotes"

"In calculus class we just finished revolutions of solids It made my head spin."