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Joke of the Day

"Fresno. I want to live in Fresno, because it rhymes. Rhymes with what? Because I said so."

"Why did Lady Gaga wear seashells to the VMAs? Because B-shells were too small."

"Sometimes I think I want to have a baby but then I wake up the next morning still holding my beer and I think maybe not"

"What makes mexican and black jokes so similar? Once you've heard Juan you've heard Jamal."

"An unfortunate blind date. that's the last blind date I go on. She turned up. hit me with her cane then her dog bit me. It was like she couldn't even see."

"Ha Long is many Dongs"

"What fish only swims at night ? A starfish !"

"I love picking out my wife's panties except this isn't my house and now some dudes are yelling for me to come downstairs with my hands up"

"Boys want to play Most young men like the idea of (eventually) marrying a living doll; but on a first date, they'd actually prefer a wined-up toy."

"Give a girl a plane ticket... ... and she'll fly for a day. Push a girl from a plane, and she'll get to fly for the rest of her life."