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Joke of the Day

"One of the anchors on CBS Sports just referred to smoking weed as ""toking salad"" and from that alone I'll bet my life savings he's a dad"

"What did the black kid get for christmas? Your bike."

"A little girl asked her father ""Daddy? Do all Fairy Tales begin with Once Upon A Time?"" And he replied ""No there is a whole series of Fairy Tales that begin with 'If Elected I promise...'"""

"Why is there a ""D"" in fridge but not in refrigerator? Because you don't put the ""D"" in the big ones."

"Did you hear about the gangster panda? It eats shoots and leaves."

"Father's Day tip: Your Dad is busy this weekend."

"I've always wanted to shake Muhammad Ali's hand Unfortunately, Parkinson's beat me to it."

"Things were different in the 80s one time I was kidnapped for a week and no one looked for me. I came home & my room was converted to a gym."

"How come my wife can't hold her bladder for more than three hours but she can hold a grudge for fourteen years?"

"50 shades of grey After reading 50 Shades of Grey my wife asked me to tie her tightly to the bed. ""Now what?"" I asked. ""Hurt me!"" ""Ok. You have saggy tits"""