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Joke of the Day
"My psychiatrist asked me about how many times a day I exaggerate. I responded, ""Like a billion."""
Next Joke
"Subway...I don't know whats worse.. What Jared did or you raising your Februany $5 footlong to 6$."
"How many nymphomaniacs does it take to screw in a light-bulb? As many as will fit."
"Why does little Timmy keep throwing up gang signs? Because he ate too much of them."
"What do you call a Yugoslavian Pimp? Yasalivason Medickubitch"
"Power surge at the A/C factory... Fans shocked."
"Dance like the picture's not being tagged. Love like you've never been unfriended. Tweet like no one's following."
"How do you guys feel about that new drug-resistant superbug? It makes me sick."
"Sorry I burnt your degree from the University of Phoenix thinking that a better degree would rise from its ashes."
"Every tweet has 140 characters and if some of you learned the difference between it's and its you'd have one to spare."