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Joke of the Day

"I hate when I meet a beautiful woman and have to leave bc someone who beat me in a rap battle is walking my way"

"I hate it when I go to bed and forget to turn off my swag."

"I just love the new minecraft update. It's groundbreaking."

"Kylo Ren: I can't read your mind! How are you resisting me?! Rey: Occlumency lessons from Professor Snape."

"Do you know that opening windows make the wifi slower. It's because the wifi signal goes out the window."

"Look you asked me to be your child's Godfather so don't get pissed at me because I taught him how to break knees and collect debts."

"""WITH OUR POWERS COMBINED!"" ""EARTH"" ""WIND"" ""WATER"" ""FIRE"" ""HEART"" ""SELF-LOATHING"" get outta here Eli ""SORRY"""

"The best sign of a healthy relationship is no sign of it on Facebook."

"Why do people like Trump over Obama? Because Orange is the new Black"

"Bonnie Tyler is performing a concert in Greece next month. She'll be singing her classic. I need a Euro."