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Joke of the Day

"I hate when I meet a beautiful woman and have to leave bc someone who beat me in a rap battle is walking my way"

"Doctor: What seems to be th- Me: -Medicinal marijuana! Doc: I'm sorry? Me: Let's start with the answer, then work on the problem, ok?"

"What do you call an Orangutan, a tortoise and a hamster in cars? Top Gear, ^^or ^whatever ^^their ^^new ^^amazon ^^car ^^show ^^will ^^be ^^called."

"What do you call an 800 pound gorilla? Anything he wants to be called."

"Cop: can u describe your attacker Me: super aggressive, with a big nose & powerful arms Cop: u just described a seagull Me: he took my chips"

"Just got a peek at Santa's naughty list! Amazingly, it's almost identical to my friends list. Can't believe some of the things you people have done!"

"What element can combine with two nitrogens and an oxygen, and still have there be only one element? XeNON."

"What did the chick pea say when it got a stomach ache? I falafel."

"What kind of shoes do pedophiles wear? White Vans"

"A man walks into a bar and is immediately disqualified from the Limbo World Championships."