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Joke of the Day

"Red cross: would you like to volunteer to give blood? Me: oh, no thank you, I already involuntarily give blood 5 days out of the month"

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"Russian joke A bear is walking through the forest when he sees a car on fire. The bear gets into it and burns to death."
"Boy and girl of class 2 asked teacher: ""can kids of our age have kids?"" Teacher replied "" NO Never!!"" Boy said to girl : ""see i told you not to worry!!!!""."
"I had skylights installed at my place last night and I don't get why the people who live upstairs aren't okay with this."
"What's the best month for dating? Sep-tinder!"
"What do you call a 6 year old with no friends? A Sandy Hook survivor."
"Coining Money. George Washington: We should put ""We Trust In God"" on our money. Thomas Jefferson: Great idea! Did you get that? Yoda: Yep"
"A man walks into an auto parts store and says ""I'd like a rear view mirror for my Yugo."" The man behind the counter thinks about this for a while then says ""Yup seems like a fair trade to me."""
"What do you call a dumb nerd? A geek."
"Why didn't the dog want to go into outer space? Because he was scared of vacuums!"