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Joke of the Day
"Donald Trump truly made history... Winning an argument against a woman."
Next Joke
"Knock Knock Who's there ! Butch ! Butch who ? Butch your arms around me !"
"Being an adult is mainly drinking coffee and pretending to be productive."
"In the midst of all this negativity and hate please take comfort in remembering that I have a 5 star uber passenger rating"
"Sorry I threw rice at the coffin. I don't get invited to much."
"Her : You hang up first. nnMe : *click*"
"[trying to impress fiancee's entire family] Waiter: Your bill for- Oh I got it! [looks at bill & spits wine] WHO ORDERED THE ""SUBTOTAL""?!?"
"What do you call a bird that speaks Spanish? A Si-gull"
"What I really need is a woman who loves me for my money but doesn't understand math."
"If pedicures were called toe jobs, men would get them, too."