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Joke of the Day

"I'm on a seefood diet I see food and I eat it."

"What do you call a Jamaican teacher at Hogwarts? De mentor."

"My humor is kind of like food... Not everyone gets it."

"Why didn't Hitler get an A on the math exam? He didn't complete the final solution. I wrote that in my sleep."

"Just had to cut ties with the girl I was dating after I found out we both wanted different things. She wanted a relationship and I wanted a better looking girlfriend."

"What did the clitoris say to her therapist? ""I'm a bundle of nerves right now!"""

"Why is there a wolf on Wall Street. Animals are bad with money. My cat just lost $80 at high-stakes uno"

"Me: WHO DREW ON THE WALL?! 4-year-old: 2-year-old: 4-year-old: 2-year-old: 4-year-old: The dog."

"Boss: Lunch meeting, let's go. Me: Do I have to? Boss: Free food and unlimited alcohol. Me: *moonwalks to the car*"

"Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off? It was a while ago... but I heard he's al right now"