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Joke of the Day

"Him: I just had sex with that woman! Me: She's 60. Him: I know. Me: I Hope you used protection or you might have caught osteoporosis."

"I'm straight but not ""get my alibi"" straight."

"Damn girl are you a pair of sexy knickers??? You're cute on the outside but you're only covering a c*nt"

"[Warning a bit racist joke] What do you say to a black guy in a suit ? Will the defendant please rise !"

"Most people see a ""pregnant mom"" planned parenthood sees a ""parts store."""

"What did the pirate with the steering wheel in his pants say? ""Argh it's driving me nuts!"""

"My cousin couldn't pay the church for her exorcism So they repossessed her."

"Twilight drinking game rules: 1) drink 40 shots when you press play so you can die before the movie starts."

"What do you do with epileptic lettuce? You make a seizure salad!"

"How do you screw up a joke? You punchup the fuckline"