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Joke of the Day
"What is the best way to break a shield apart? Seth Rollins with a chair"
Next Joke
"If you don't wear a seatbelt while on a plane, you might hit the seat in front of you when it smashes into the ground at terminal velocity."
"Inspired by T.G.I. Fridays, I opened a restaurant called C.L.I. Tuesdays. No one could find it."
"*puts crime-scene photos in a rocket* Ok stand back ""Detective, what are u doing?"" What does it look like, I'm launching this investigation"
"I really like some metamorphic rocks... They're the schist!"
"I bought my son a puppy... I bought my son a puppy for his birthday but I accidentally ran him over as I was backing out my driveway. At least I still have the puppy"
"You know what the most infuriating thing ever is? [removed]"
"A cartoonist died in his home... Details are sketchy."
"What's the name of the best brewer in the world? Bock Goodale"
"I'll bet when two cannibals get trapped in an elevator going to lunch, around the fifth minute, things start getting a little weird."