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Joke of the Day

"A new species of fish have evolved to have wrists They're called metacarpals."

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"Two men walk into a bar.... ...the third one sees this and ducks."
"Suicide Bomber ""Now I'm only gonna show you this once"""
"A magician was driving in his car... ...and he turned into a driveway."
"Best thing about being a professional bagpiper is.. We get the best blow jobs."
"[Rumpelstiltskin comes to take first born son] ""Give me what you promised unless you can guess my name"" Here ""Aren't you going to guess?"""
"Ray Rice and Janay Rice go together..... like peanut butter..and whatever punches peanut butter in the face"
"Which knight of the round table had Diabetes? Sir Lance-a-lot"
"I once tried to be a cat... It didn't go pur-fectly, but it went well... ( )"
"What did one crow say to the other? Caw dude?"