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Joke of the Day

"Other people are gettin these amber alerts, right? Like, it's not up to me to find these kids?"

"An eagle gets sick and is arrested ... because, he is ill-eagle"

"How many Juggalos does it take to change a light bulb? FUCKIN' LIGHT BULBS! HOW DO THEY WORK!?!"

"What's black and white with red all over it? A nun with multiple stab wounds."

"What's the difference between North Korea amd South Korea? North Koreans have no Seoul. Thought of this very early in the morning waiting to board a plane."

"[Glass slipper fits on ugly girl with same shoe size as Cinderella] Prince Charming: Um... well. Tell ya what, I'm gonna keep on looking."

"Photographers are the worst! They frame you, then shoot you, then hang you on the wall."

"They hired another Russian guy at my work He seems to think everything that Ukrainian guy tells him is so obvious."

"Why do watermelons have water in Them? Because they are planted in the spring!"

"A man walks into a library and says to the librarian, ""do you have that book for men with small penises?"" ""Yeah it's on the third lane"" ""Okay, thanks"""