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Joke of the Day

"Book, you look so much thinner! I know! I had my appendix removed!"

"What do you call a woman on a cruise ship in Mexico using the diving board at the pool? A broad abroad on a board aboard."

"My girlfriend broke up with me over my obsession with linkin park. But in the end it doesn't even matter."

"Why did the tomato blush? Because it saw the salad dressing."

"What s the difference between toilet paper and toast? Toast is brown on both sides."

"I bet Dell Curry is not mad... he's just disappointed. Happy Fathers Day!"

"Her: The laundry pods are missing! Me: Oh really? H: Did you eat them again? M: Absolutely not *burps bubbles* why? H: JUST CALL IT A HUNCH!"

"What's the difference between a Bull Dyke and a Bull Elephant? ...about 100lbs and a flannel shirt"

"Truthful Tuesday: The last time I had sex, I was so excited afterward I fired my musket skyward, alerting the Confederates to our presence."

"Son asked me what an 'erection' was & somehow I referenced Pinocchio. So I either cured him of lying or launched his career as a politician."