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Joke of the Day

"A chemist walks into a bar and orders a glass of h2o... The next guy in line says, ""I'll have a glass of h2o, too."" He died shortly after."

"I put a sock on my doorknob To let people know I'm getting busy with another sock."

"Without me it would just be aweso. Just saying."

"What do you get when you cross a penis with a potato? A Dictator."

"I was going to smoke a joint with some Mexicans But when I asked if anyone had papers, they all ran off."

"whats the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish wake? There is one less drunk at the wake"

"How does a duck swim from one side of the pond to the other? Very Quackly"

"Q.How Do you put an elephant in a fridge in 3 simple steps A.Open the fridge, put in the elephant, close the fridge"

"I just found out that my UPS guy is a monkey... ...and he's driving me bananas!"

"The good thing about being tall is, you can't get lost in a crowd. The bad thing is, you can't get lost in a crowd."