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Joke of the Day

"Wanna hear a joke? Women's rights"

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"My entire day will be spent laughing at my children because they have to go back to school tomorrow.."
"What do you call the first sperm that reaches the egg? The ova achiever"
"If I don't get off Reddit, my dad says he will smash my head against the keybosdqAFQ#D!E"
"A group of people were yelling at me in the movie theater. It got so loud I had to take my phone call outside."
"Confucius say...Man who fall in sewer trough, in deep shit."
"I'm beginning to question your proclamation of your ""spiritual gifts"". You are about as intuitive as my autocorrect."
"Actual quote from a kid visiting from China Q: Do you like it hear in America? K: Yes. Q: Why? K: Because the sky here is blue."
"Why does Trump love babies. Because one day when they are old enough, he'll either Fire em or Fuck em."
"Im trying to get into classical music... ...but I cant find any original recordings. All the music is performed by cover bands."