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Joke of the Day

"I'm taking a course with a focus on muscle fatigue. I don't want to talk about it. ...It's a sore subject."

"Don't have money for a cab so I keep calling ambulances and telling them I feel better when I'm close to my destination"

"What is the difference between a barking dog and an umbrella? The umbrella can be shut up."

"Tomb = Toom Womb = Woom Bomb = Boom"

"Don't get me wrong, I'm grateful to have a job. I just wish it wasn't THIS job."

"What's black and white and red all over (updated) Wall Street Journal Online."

"Judge: Guilty Me: Sayyoudidwhat. Judge: What did you say? Me: Judge? Did you just reverse my sentence? *Stage dives into cheering jury*"

"It's called a ponytail because there is a small horse inside your head growing his tail out of you."

"It's not premarital sex If you never get married"

"My Favorite Joke as a Kid. ""What's the difference between an oral and rectal thermometer?"" The Taste!"