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Joke of the Day
"Guess who I ran into when I went to get my glasses. Everybody"
Next Joke
"*Paper beats rock* *Paper beats eggs* *Paper beats his girlfriend* *Paper beats his three year old*"
"Bjork Q: What does Bjork do when she's horny? A: She watches pjorn."
"I bet nobody noticed Superman flying around at first, so Clark just started pointing out every bird and plane until it caught on"
"Today I forgot to comb my hair, but people thought I was nice. Then, nothing of consequence happened. So today was every Michael Cera movie."
"A man and a woman are lying in bed late night... ...and the woman asks her man: ""Honey, do you prefer smart or pretty women?"" and the man responds calmly: ""Neither, baby, I prefer you."""
"Q. Why do bagpipers leave their cases on their dashboards? A. So they can park in handicapped zones."
"[zoo] ""This is the bear kids"" Wow I want his arms ""What? You cant ha.."" *kid shows tour guide 2nd amendment* ""Bring him the arms smh"""
"People who criticize the Bible should keep in mind it was My first novel."
"What did the drummer get on his test? Drool"