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Joke of the Day

"Remember kids, dark humour is like food... Not everybody gets it."

"Just like every year, this April 1st will mark a day were people around the world fall for silly fibs and wildly embellished stories. Then they will fall for April Fools jokes."

"If I have a son, he's going to be named Alvin Simon Theodore, and it'll be funny as hell whenever anyone gets mad and yells his full name."

"What's Whitney Houston's favorite type of coordination? HAND-EEEEEEEEEEEYYYYYYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!"

"What do pink flamingos have on their front lawns? Plastic Italians."

"Thousands of stoners give up smoking weed to avoid having any association with Justin Bieber. Cleverest. Government. Propaganda. Ever."

"At breakfast this morning, my wife said she's leaving me because of my obsession with Twitter. I nearly choked on my #Brown"

"What did the conductor do when half of the cello section called in sick a week before a major concert? He was forced to resort to excessive violins."

"What do you call the runs in space? The floats"

"What do little sisters ride? A Nii-san"