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Joke of the Day

"I wish my girlfriend would stop confusing my chivalry for chauvinism... Pssh... fucking women."

"How do chocolate labs not die of themselves?"

"On his 22nd birthday, my brother came out as a transvestite to our family and celebrated by wearing a miniskirt... ...that shows a lot of balls."

"Have you heard about the ATM that got addicted to money? I heard it suffered from withdrawls."

"I know... I know where the percentage symbol goes %50 of the time."

"Almost every post that hits the frontt page Has a misspelled title."

"Why are turds tapered? So your asshole doesn't slam shut."

"What's the difference between a dirty bus station and a lobster with breast implants? One's a crusty bus station and the other's a busty crustacean."

"You know why women are bad at parking? Because they are constantly lied to about what 8 inches is."

"In Russia, if you're blue, and you don't where to go to, why don't you go where fashion sits: Putin on the Ritz"