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Joke of the Day

"What did the dolphin say when three orcas swam by? Whale, whale, whale, who do we have here? Please, this is a cry for help."

"Why did the sperm cross the road? Because I put on the wrong sock this morning..."

"Announcer: ""Welcome to the Super Bowl 50 Halftime Show. Are you ready to rock?!"" [crowd goes nuts] A: ""Well too bad, here's Coldplay"""

"For all the English lovers... The past, present, and future walk into a bar. It was tense."

"What's the difference between a violin and a viola? A viola burns longer."

"I haven't seen any new Bigfoot pictures in a while... I hope he's ok."

"My biggest problem with passive smoking is having to follow the smoker around."

"My ex-girlfriend once said ""It's either me or Twitter."" I wonder how she's doing."

"Eating a full box of chocolate is like shi# posting. After some time you get a lot of backfire and takes a lot of time to get yourself clean."

"Richmond's baseball team had midget wrestling last night, if anyone's looking for a city with rich culture and a progressive vibe."