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Joke of the Day

"Mom: Why are you eating my flowers? Me: I'm gonna be young FOREVER! Mom: How? Me: Duh, from the stem cells. Mom: I'm worried about you."

"Why did the surgeon refuse to dress for work? He didn't want no scrubs"

"Henry Tudor: ""I'm going to build a car park in the centre of Leicester."" Richard III: ""Over my dead body."""

"Marriage brings two people together to solve issues they never had before"

"Harry Potter's favorite band Just read the new Harry Potter story on Pottermore and learned one interesting factoid. His favorite band is Wand Erection."

"What did the blonde do when she discovered that most accidents happen within a mile from home? She moved."

"We could hit every terrorist on the Most Wanted List tomorrow, if we turned it over to Google's ad department."

"My Son's #1 Concern When my three-year-old was told to pee in a cup at the doctor's office, he unexpectedly got nervous. With a shaking voice, he asked, ""Do I have to drink it?"""

"What do you call an April Fool's!"

"I have just invented a perfume made from holy water Eau my god"