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Joke of the Day

"Doesn't count, officer, you forgot to read me my amanda rights! ""Your what?"" You know, my... [mumbles] banana rights."

"Q: How do you deal with heavy traffic? A: Heavy psychedelics."

"What did the Chinese man say when Winter came around? Reddit snow, reddit snow, reddit snow!"

"CLOSE THE DOOR, YOU'RE LETTING ALL THE WIFI OUT"

"What type of shoes does a ninja wear? Sneakers."

"Latvian potato eating contest. Latvia man enter contest eat potato. Many other contestants. Contest start. Is no potato. All men sad. And hungry."

"I remember being told that everytime you shave it off, it grows back thicker Can't wait to see my new cock."

"My doctor told me to start killing people. Well, not in those exact words. He said I had to reduce the stress in my life. Same thing!"

"A poor virgin had a big black guy as a landlord Now he's just poor."

"Instead of thinking about what you're missing, try thinking about what you have that everyone else is missing."