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Joke of the Day
"3yo: make me oatmeal me: *poof* you're oatmeal 3yo: me: *makes oatmeal"
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"You know what's best about Texas? It's keeps all the texans in one fucking place!"
"How many aardvarks can ride on an elephant? Six... three on the back and three in the trunk!"
"It's time to clean the refrigerator when something closes the door from the inside..."
"What is a black cat's favourite TV show ? Miami Mice !"
"What do you call a shitty bungalow? Dungalow."
"I'm going to tell you a joke about a broken pencil........ Never mind. It's pointless."
"Irreconcilable differences The judge says to Mickey, ""I can't grant you a divorce because you think Minnie is crazy."" ""I didn't say she was crazy,"" says Mickey, ""I said she was fucking Goofy!"""
"English is difficult to learn. It can be taught through tough thorough thought, though."
"Give a dog a bone and he'll be like, ""Oh wow, I love these, thanks"" Teach a dog to bone and he'll be like, ""dude, I got this"""