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Joke of the Day

"Have you heard about the Roman cannibalism trial? They asked the defendant if he was sorry for his crimes. He said no, he was gladiator."

"I finally got my first interview since moving to the US. Almost able to say something more romantic to the GF than ""you're out of batteries"""

"Have you heard the watermelon joke? You have now! ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^I'msosorry"

"What do a hockey player and a hippie chick have in common? They both shower after 3 periods."

"So I was at the bar the other night exchanging pleasantries with an attractive woman. She said she would like to read my palm... Okay! She takes my hand and asks... ""Do you come here often?"""

"Intellectual. A man who can explain electricity but doesn't know how to screw in a light bulb."

"What does a mathematics professor do when he is constipated? He works it out with a pencil."

"Did I tell you about my Viagra addiction? It was the hardest 6 months of my life."

"My ""15 minutes of fame"" are when I get my paycheck and everyone I owe money comes to collect"

"Why is the Doctor an excellent chef? He's a Thyme Lord"