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Joke of the Day

"Jewish Pizza What is the difference between a jew and a Pizza? The pizza does not scream when you put it in a oven."

"My family keeps bringing up my felony like I'm afraid to commit another one."

"Why are Aspirins and Paracetamol white? Well, you want them to work, don't you?"

"I'm going skiing in Colorado. They say there are a lot of blacks there. But there are a lot of blues and greens as well, so I should be okay."

"Why are Jedi kids so fat? Because they were force fed."

"I wanted a painting that wouldn't get boring so I painted a mirror."

"If a stork makes white babies, and a crow makes black babies, what makes no babies? A Swallow"

"smart husband Wife: honey, can i hold henry? (their new baby) Husband: wait until he cries. Wife: why?? Husband: because i cant find him!!!!!!"

"When I heard that Dr. Heimlich died at age 96... I got all choked up."

"Please. Old people. When you comment on a Facebook pic you don't need to end with Love, James. WE CAN SEE YOUR NAME YOU'RE NOT AN OSTRICH"