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Joke of the Day

"I hate when girls say, ""you probably say that to every girl."" don't you use the same resume when applying to different jobs?"

"There was a blackout in my town last night It's okay I called the police."

"So a mushroom walks into a bar.. And the bartender says ""we don't serve your kind here"". The mushroom responds ""Why not? I'm a fungi!"""

"Taking calculus has made me want to become Prime Minister of a European country Then I can just throw money at problems instead of trying to integrate them."

"A Pentium processor engineer is counting visitors to a bar He's counted 12.000000000057249999 patrons so far."

"I managed to hit 18 holes today... And I still have time for golf."

"Why are dicks like quantum particles Measuring them changes the result"

"What do rodents do after dinner? Gopher a walk."

"Two men walk into a bar. The first says, ""i'll have some H20"". The second says, ""sounds good, I'll have some H20 too"" The second man [died](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hydrogen_peroxide)."

"At 4-way stop, the first person to finish their text has the right of way right?"