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Joke of the Day

"My Doctor told me I had to stop masturbating. Apparently it was making it difficult to complete the exam."

"Why did the blonde get fired from the M&M factory? Because she kept throwing out all the Ws."

"The police get mad at you if you try to marry a squirrel. Even if you're pretty sure it's a girl squirrel."

"I'm no gynecologist but I know a c*nt when I see one."

"What's the easiest way to get a virus into ISIS computer systems? By sending them executables."

"Why do women find the guy in 50 Shades of Grey sexy? beats me"

"My friend entred me in a double-entendre competition That's it."

"My wife wants to go on a romantic date for Valentine's Day so I guess I'll stay home with the kids."

"We all exist due to a radioactive explosion that formed the universe and with endless posibilities... ...you're sitting on your computer reading jokes on the internet."

"My grandmother finds it important to stay in shape, so she started walking five miles a day when she was 60. She's 97 today and we don't know where the hell she is."