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Joke of the Day

"Critics say Botox is too expensive... ...but I spoke to fifty people who just paid for the treatment, and none of them looked surprised."

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"What is Ke$ha's favorite candy? TicTac"
"Never seen a bar fight break out while people are drinking wine. Beer, yes. Hard liquor, yes. But not wine."
"Why do uniformed soldiers need to eat their fruits and vegetables? If they don't, they'll be irregulars."
"10's homework question: ""Which appliance in your home do you think is the most useful?"" His answer: ""My mom."""
"I wanted to drive to the shop to buy some guacamole I didn't avocado"
"Knock knock Who's there. Nobody. Nobody who. (And so concludes this joke from my 3yr old. We think it's pretty good.)"
"Adding anyone comment need to no my safari"
"What's black and white and red all over? A cow that's just been murdered."
"The Manager you asked to speak to doesn't give a fuck either."