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Joke of the Day

"What Did The Egg Say To the Boiling Water? I just got laid by a chick, its gonna take me a while to get hard."

"Yo momma's so fat, when she butt dials, she makes a conference call"

"Female Viagra. Niagara."

"I've grown bored of reality, So I started watching cable news."

"What do you call a myth from the middle east? A turban legend"

"flight attendant: sir, are you raising your hand me: how do i access the wifi fa: im doing safety announcements me: is that lowercase"

"Why do people with the Flu stand in corners? Its always 90 Degrees"

"What do you call a cheap circumcision ? A rip off."

"Q: How many Englishmen does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: What do you mean change it? It's a perfectly good bloody bulb! We have had it for a thousand years and it has worked just *fine*."

"How does a mathematician get to work? He derives!"