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Joke of the Day

"5 year old: Where does wind come from, daddy? Me: It comes from people asking too many questions."

"What would you call a 90 year old hooker? Ho-spice"

"Sex is like CPR. Two inches at 100 beats per minute."

"Did you hear about the guy who had a really short temper because of his botched sex change? He was always going around half-cocked."

"Right now, somewhere in China, someone is wokking their dog"

"I got attacked by a yob with bat down the local park yesterday.. I was really impressed with how well he had it trained"

"So a guy gets on a bus carrying a pole. The bus driver asks him ""Are you a pole vaulter?"" The man replies ""No, I'm Swiss. And how did you know my last name was Vaulter?""."

"If you need me, I'll be in the bathroom I guess it's finally time to shave my legs for spring *Walks away with hedge trimmers"

"Deleting cookies from my browser history is fine but I'd rather delete cookies from my eating history."

"Don't hesitate when you come to a fork in the road. Be bold. Pick that fork up and take it home. Free cutlery!"