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Joke of the Day

"When Bruce Jenner changed sex's. I thought damn... he's Trans-Jenner?"

"How many Mexicans does it take to change a lightbulb? One, you racist!"

"I haven't slept for ten days because that would be too long."

"What do call a bad haircut you got from a Native American? A-patchy scalping Edit: Changed haircut to scalping. Because that's what I came up with this morning."

"My doctor says that I'm unstable and that I should get a lobotomy... Fuck him, first thing in the morning I'm gonna march right in there and give him a piece of my mind!"

"This is no place for memorials, petitions, or any of that emotional shit."

"How can you tell when a skunk is angry? It raises a stink!"

"Did you hear about the goth kid with dyslexia? He sold his soul to Santa."

"Commas can change the meaning of a sentence. Example: I like to eat apples. ---> I like to eat commas."

"I like my women like I like my cigars 7 years old and coming from Cuba in a burlap sack"