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Joke of the Day

"Friday night is Fred Flintstone sliding down the dinosaur's back."

"Why are prison escapees so frustrating? Because they never finish their s"

"If you like pina coladas And getting caught in the rain Then you are some kind of weirdo *swipes left on tinder*"

"What does Supertramp do after buying rice? They take the long-grain home."

"What is a pirates favorite letter? Most say the letter 'R' But a pirates first love is the mighty 'C' By the mighty 'C' I mean the clitoris YARRRRHHHHHhhh....."

"What has TWO wings, and ONE arrow? A Chinese telephone. Wing wing. Arrow?"

"Poland... Poland - a country between Russia to the east and Germany to the west. If they piss Russia off, they turn the gas off. If they piss Germany off they turn the gas on."

"I don't get how people say Mickey Rourke looks bad for his age... ...don't they realise his first film role was in 1941?!"

"I found out I was dyslexic when I got invited to a toga party. I turned up as a goat."

"If a bear tries to attack you in the woods, give it your bicycle. Maybe it's one of those circus bears, you never know."