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Joke of the Day

"I asked my immigrant Asian parents if they knew what Roe v. Wade was. ""Umm... the decision we had to make when we came to this country?"""

"Did you know that Hillary's planning on being the first TG President? Yeah - after she's elected, she has plans to turn into a woman."

"Why do Greeks like fried foods? Because they're greasy"

"""The Sun is dying. We need help"" the scientists are speechless. Cool Dad kicks in the door & removes his shades ""It's daylight savings time"""

"What is matthew mcconaughey' least favorite part of interstellar? ""The girls get older, but he stays the same age"" -first attempt at a original joke (apologies if its a repost that I'm unaware of)"

"How many A.D.D. kids does it take to change a light bulb? Look a squirrel!"

"I was in NYC and a black guy asked me if the Yankees won. I replied, ""Yeah, man, you're free."""

"Why is Jesus never able to finish more than half of a crossword puzzle? He always gets stuck on across."

"I got a job at a bakery today I kneaded the dough."

"Why was the Pepsi crying while lifting weights? Because he was soda-pressing"