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Joke of the Day

"[in hip-hop voice] uh"

"Wait. What? You need two people for sex? What does the other one do?"

"To the question What are you doing here?' 72% answered negative."

"What's the difference between a seamstress and a whale A seamstress cuts up frills and a whale fucks up krill's."

"Haram Two jews walk into a bar. NOT IN MY COUNTRY"

"I'd hate to give a speech to nudists because I'd be nervous and then I'd have to imagine them without their skin on and skeletons are scary."

"Why's Guantanamo Bay full of actors? Because they all shot pilots."

"Q: What you get when four men go fishing and one comes back not catching anything. A: Three Men And A Baby"

"What do you cal a bear with extreme mood swings? A bi-polar bear."

"Starting a diet is a lot like starting a lawn mower, you struggle and sweat and end up on the couch eating ice cream with your shirt off."