69478
Joke of the Day
"I am a woman, hear my eyes roll."
Next Joke
"In Russia, if you're blue, and you don't where to go to, why don't you go where fashion sits: Putin on the Ritz"
"ELI5: What are thoooooooose?!?"
"Taco Bell is planning on doubling the 'meat' in their ingredients. Unlike Cadbury, they're informing us in advance."
"Girlfriend pressuring you to have a baby? Set the alarm on her phone to an infant screaming. If that doesn't changer her mind..DUMP HER!"
"What is the difference between a JCB and a giraffe? One has hydraulics the other has high bolics."
"[At bar] Me: As a joke, I'm gonna pee my pants Wife: Seriously? You're a married man now M: Right...sorry. I'm gonna pee ""our"" pants #BT140"
"You name your cat Bowl. What would the name on the cat's bowl be? It would be 'Bowl' and all of your friends would leave you because you are an idiot and named your cat Bowl."
"If there isn't a fireworks company whose slogan is ""our business is booming,"" that seems like a real missed opportunity."
"[on a test drive] Me: Haha the heated seat feels like I peed my pants! Dealer: This car doesn't have heated seats. Me: Does it have napkins?"