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Joke of the Day

"It's just sad how often I see zookeepers breaking their own 'Dont Feed the Animals' rule."

"What Austrian girls and wine have in common? Both mature in a cellar."

"I think it's lame how Justin Bieber has millions of Beliebers yet Queen Latifah only has like 8 Beliefahs."

"Why did the tomato blush? Because he saw the salad dressing."

"Q.) What would you call a bunch of blondes stacked on top of each other? A.) An air mattress."

"I went to a metal concert, the singer was a bit ill... Still fuckin' sick though!"

"What's a bananas favourite business to own? A peel-estate business"

"I got a Jury Summons today, I'm sending them my Twitter profile to get out of it. Fingers crossed."

"What's the difference between a collection and an addiction? I don't have an alcohol collection."

"Where does a librarian sleep? Between the covers. I will now show myself to the door."