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Joke of the Day

"Where does a librarian sleep? Between the covers. I will now show myself to the door."

"I've waited long to say this. I think we should all gift watches to the folks at /r/trees. It's high time."

"The tennis factory near me got closed down after local residents complained... Apparently they were making a racquet."

"Is it appropriate for a receptionist at a sperm clinic to tell their clients ""thanks for coming"" as they leave?"

"My parents are so impressed with my brothers daily 10 minute workout. I can do it in 8."

"What do you get when you put a bunch of roosters into a compactor? A cock block!"

"Why does my abusive mother hate vegetables? Beats me."

"Is elliott a lawn mower? He is really gay"

"where do babies come from?? where the hell are they GOING is what i wanna know, folks!"

"I thought my roommate was joking when he said Gary Oldman was in the Harry Potter movies. He was dead Sirius."